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It’s Time To Return To Chivalry Before Social Media


A brief scroll on the screen of your phone or computer, you check the notifications. However, the comment you are reading is not a kitten, meme, nor someone needing help after a trauma. The quick obnoxious bomb of a response was planted by a troll, an acquaintance or a business contact who obviously does not know better than to poke that buried old injury.

The blood boils in your veins until you reach for your invisible tool on your make-believe tool belt. Instead of your ‘screen smasher’, you find your tummy. Wait, before you succumb to a rabbit trail about how you are not losing enough weight, let’s get back to the revenge on that son of a fish who reeks of elderberries. The impossible task of smashing the screen is set behind you, leaving the perfect idea of a witty comeback. Tap Tap Tap, Delete delete delete. Perhaps, you can introduce torture to them like they hurt you. That’s it… An enraged comment will carry the right amount of kryptonite. No? At least, tell ‘em you’re offended!

OyVey! Step back! Time for you to inhale a deep breath of oxygen. Why? You almost mimicked the person that did that exact same thing on your post the other day. You did scoff at them… remember? I know you have been there, because I fight this scenario daily whether on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, etc…

With great technology comes tremendous responsibility. A hater on my twitter responded, ‘The internet gave me the reason to be a douche-bag’. I mean, really? Is this the social part of social media? Is this what social media has come down to?

With the help of 2 Facebook profile accounts, I am connected to over 7,000 people. My biggest rule for debating on my wall is everyone to refrain from the nasty habit of name calling. It is my personal experience in diffusing tension. I admit, I birthed the rule after two of my friends fought each other on my wall and then my closer friend blocked me. I didn’t do anything and she had the nerve to block me? This broad rule has backfired a few times with egotistical people believing they inherited the right to belittle others. I guess we come from different backgrounds even if we abide by the same political beliefs. My childhood lacked the social grace in setting fire to a bag of steaming waste on front porches before scurrying like a bat out of hell.

If we take the time in the real world to smile and wave when we are slightly offended, then we can perform the same respect on the web. Hate is a poison which leads to the dark side. So why increase it? You’ve heard the old saying, ‘pick your battles’? I concur, but add: Why give up? Why hope for evil to befall you and those around you? If you contribute hate by digging yourself deeper into a hole, how are you going to climb out? If you believe your own fate isn’t controlled and you can choose to change your own destiny, then why sit around and watch the world burn around you?

Change the world around you and leave the world beyond to be affected down the road. You have enough to handle just by making a difference in your own network. Smile, then scroll on down the post leading to the death of your own soul. It is not an over-and-done-with-this kind of task. This is a wake-up-and-repeat kindness, respect and chivalry every hour.

If I can do it, then you can do it.

May the stories of what I have lived through inspire you on another day.

May Your Life Be Electrified.

Jae Byrd Wells

Jae Byrd Wells, author of the science fiction Tales From School Series and the inspirational humorous series, Get the Bubblewrap. Jae is a national speaker and social media consultant. She graduated with a Letter & College Scholarship for filming football. After dabbling in modeling, she studied Marketing and Media in College which semi-prepared her for her career in the world of Entertainment. Her colored and rocky past in the desert called ‘life’ has not robbed her continued thirst for adventure, which enables her to inspire those around her to not lose faith, love, chivalry, and respect. When she’s not busy engaging on social media, writing, teaching, consulting, co-hosting radio shows, or speaking, Jae enjoys life as a pioneer, geek, cosplayer, and movie buff. She lives with her husband, four children (5, if you include the parrot) and her ‘petting zoo’ in Kansas.

Jae Byrd Wells is available for speaking engagements, keynotes and conferences. Please contact her through LinkedIn.












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